Friday, September 19, 2008

the depth of love

no one can comprehend



how high


how wide


how deep





is the love of Christ.










But i am nearly convinced that the depth of a mother's love for her children comes from the heart of God to show us the depth of His love for His children.



i remember when Eliana was born, i felt like i had been let into some kind of secret society that i had never known existed.


motherhood.




you lose yourself to care for one whose only expression of returning the care is calming under your touch, sleeping at your breast in way that they seem to melt right into your soul.





then it hit me:


i die to self to live in Christ



i die to self to raise a child



as i would do anything for this child, so Christ has done and will do everything for me.









i know many people who look at the cost of parenthood and are deterred

scared

delayed




knowing the sacrifice

commitment

loss of self



that motherhood and parenthood require.




they never will fully know the joy,

the sheer delight,


the way you will never know love until you sweep strands of hair from a sleeping baby's cheek just to kiss her one more time, because, even now at nearly 3 years old you just cant put her down...

life is harder


but fuller




life is more complex

but has more meaning



life is less about me and more about my children growing to know Christ. How i wish i was a perfect representation!




likewise


i know many people who look at the cost of fully following Christ to the ends of the earth and are deterred

scared

delayed




knowing the sacrifice

commitment

loss of self



that truly following Jesus require.




they never will fully know the joy,

the sheer delight,


the way you will never know love until you collapse in the arms of your Savior with nothing to offer but your broken, sinful self- relying on His grace to mend every flaw--and still somehow find a way to pour His Spirit into a marred vessel- that you might pour out the same on a broken and sinful world.

life is harder


but fuller




life is more complex

but has more meaning



life is less about me and more about my mirroring Christ. How i wish i was a perfect representation!






as a mother, i am happiest when my children live in love and harmony,

scripture gives me a clue that this feeling is mine because it was and is first the Lord's.

blessings,
christy





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